Consumer labels_英语愚人笑话

in case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed by stupidity, here are some actual label instructions found on consumer goods:
on a sears hairdryer: do not use while sleeping.
on a bag of fritos: you could be a winner! no purchase necessary. details inside. (the shoplifter special.)
on a bar of dial soap: directions: use like regular soap.
on a swann frozen dinners: serving suggestion: defrost. (but it's just a suggestion.)
on tesco's tiramisu dessert (printed on the bottom of box): do not turn upside-down.
on marks & spencer bread pudding: product will be hot after heating.
on packaging for a rowenta iron: do not iron clothes on body.
on boot's children's cough medicine: "do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication."
on nytol sleep aid: warning: may cause drowsiness.
on most brands of christmas lights: "for indoor or outdoor use only." (as opposed to what?)
on a japanese food processor: not to be used for the other use. (i gotta admit, i'm curious.)
on sainsbury's peanuts: "warning: contains nuts."
on an american airlines packet of peanuts: "instructions: open packet, eat nuts."
on a child's superman costume: "wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." (i don't blame the company, i blame the parents for this one.)
on a swedish chain saw: "do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals."