Question and answer_英语宗教笑话

q: how can you tell if a lawyer is well hung?
a: you can't get a finger between the rope and his neck!
q: if you are stranded on a desert island with adolph hitler, atilla the hun, and a lawyer, and you have a gun with only two bullets, what do you do?
a: shoot the lawyer twice.
q: what do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?
a: a good start!
q: how can you tell when a lawyer is lying?
a: his lips are moving.
q: what's the difference between a dead dog in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?
a: there are skid marks in front of the dog.
q: why won't sharks attack lawyers?
a: professional courtesy.
q: what do you have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand?
a: not enough sand.
q: why did god make snakes just before lawyers?
a: to practice.
a command was given to a dog: "speak!"
the dog said in return: "not without my lawyer present!"
q: why is going to a meeting of the bar association like going into a bait shop?
a: because of the abundance of suckers, leeches, maggots and nightcrawlers
q: why are there so many lawyers in the u.s.?
a: because st. patrick chased the snakes out of ireland.
q: what?s the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?
a: the lawyer charges more.